I occasionally receive emails to check that I am still an ‘active dominatrix’. As I am writing this a man keeps looking at me from the next table at Costa Coffee and I casually wonder if I have spanked him in the past ten years. But I digress. Yes I am still very active. I no longer pay for advertising so my online presence is less visible. Over the years I have gathered a small group of loyal regular clients who I spend my time with when I am not busy with my vanilla jobs. I have appointments booked as late as November and so my customers are not really the woke up horny and ‘are you available now Mistress’ crowd. I suppose that was always going to happen when I removed my telephone number from my website. I met most of my regulars over five years ago when I was working under a car park and over time friendships develop. One man (not a client) once informed me that his friend was a proper professional…like if you are supporting yourself through domination for years you can do it as an amateur! 

From the beginning I watched and took advice from women who I respected and had been on the scene for a while. I know I am preaching to the choir but some of the women I have met are the best business women I have ever come across…and they all have their own unique way of working. Women who work with integrity and have respect for their clients. I do worry about new dommes going awry as they step into the professional domination world; so here are a few pointers…

Whether you show your face or not it has absolutely no affect on your earnings. I know of at least three dommes (including myself) who have never shown our faces and in our own way have done well. In fact one of these women (not including myself!) is probably in the top 1% of earners in London. Once you show your face on the internet you can’t take it back and unfortunately there is still much stigma that could affect you doing a different job (if you want to) in the future. 

Never dump one booked client because another wants a few more hours. Yes I know the pressure from having expensive London rent but in the long run integrity will always see you right. I once had a potential beg me to drop another client and he said to google him so I could see it would be worth my while. I did google him but I still wouldn’t drop my regular. The potential was a multi millionaire but he had already proven himself to be a man of low character….especially when he said he would pay me more for more than I offer. Nope. Won’t do it. And if they push your boundaries before you meet them what the hell will they be like in the room? Which brings me to…

Having a rich client does not automatically

= being paid. Far from it. Do not be swayed that you will be ‘seen right’ later. Cash up front whether the man has a Patek Phillipe or not! 

And always always have respect about the woman in your clients life. I have seen dommes using advertising that puts down the wife. I find that grotesque. 

In the same vein don’t put down other sex workers. Stating “I am not a prostitute” is equally ugly. You list your services and leave it at that. Do not put down other workers to put yourself on a pedestal. Yes some men boundary push but I always found that putting the phone down and blocking/storing him as idiot 123 etc or ignoring emails works.

Lastly… Know your worth. As a person and as a sex worker. Don’t let what people post online or what they say to your face affect you. It’s like being at school. The bitches (and I am talking about men and women) are the insecure ones. 

Now I’m off to give a gent a caning…

Class dismissed! 

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